rise of pain in dreams
29 05 12
Drifting to the edge of awakening, I open my eyes. Almost instantly, my past pains dissolve into a beautiful nothing. The ringing in my ears fades to a low drone. My floating hands caress the air below me — weightless, I am levitating again. Through my clotted pupils, a pocket of light quickly unfolds and I begin to see that a massive glow occupies the entire sky. A maternal star with all-powerful magnetism, raising every fluid particle into the atmosphere.
Reams of bodies are released into the rising liquids, scattered across the horizon. Raindrops begin to climb and planetary juices cascade upwards. Exotic light penetrates the floating water, casting ultraviolet rays in every direction. Every gleaming body reflects back the panorama in its own crystalline interpretation. As I near the gentle giant in the sky, my blood throbs in time with the massive airwaves around me. I have surrendered to this supreme force as I enter its glistening orb. I am overcome with positive ions, tingling ecstatically. Is this birth? Am I dying? Suddenly a stabbing pain flashes through me, alarming every cell in my delicate body and sending me into cramping shocks. I paddle helplessly with my arms. Panic has taken over.
I wake up with tears streaming down my rosy cheeks but not a pin prick to my young heart. My chest is still trembling, and my hands shaking, but relief starts to wash away the adrenaline. I am stranded alone on a tiny beach isle. A sea of thick foam surges around my haven, toying and splashing its helpless castaway.
Amidst the froth and bubbles, a school of flying fish shows off its best acrobatics to get my attention. I giggle and they begin to swim, leap and flicflac in a perfect circle around me, like a semi-submerged roller-coaster. A kite creature swoops down, and begins chasing the parade. Together with a flock of feathers, they frolic and intertwine. The surrounding ocean rises up, forming a swirling wall around me. Every animated component in perfect sync to weave this kaleidoscope of colour and sound. I gaze upwards and the tall enclosure starts to close in on the sunlight. The whirlpool spoils me with its charm, but as it tries to seduce me, a thought wakes me from my hypnotic daze: “What does it want from me?”, and it shoots through my head, “Whoever falls in love, loses”. I must end this, end this now... now, NOW!
My eyes fling open at the sound of a deafening roar. Tiny bone fragments tremble as I lie paralysed. I hold my breath to hide from the creature that lurks in the dense night shade. A low slung growl gives away its sleeping place. A massive primal hunter with teeth tearing out of its skull. Long concave ears, acutely standing alert. The dim moonlight trapped by the coarse fur of its upper body, heaving with every breath. I must escape this deadly beast before it takes me for its prey.
The moon sheds its sorrow, exposing a land littered with blood and bones. A chilling wind rips through the remains as I scramble along a tiny path through the devastation. My foot gets caught on a corpse, and with a yelp, I come crashing to the ground. Suddenly I am not alone. Undead eyes awaken and glow with hunger — two pairs, now three, four... searching frantically for their uninvited visitor. With no escape I shrivel to the ground and climb inside a decaying carcass, peeping through the ribcage. Just as it seems they have moved on, a heavy foot steps into the muddy mess in front of me, stoops down and stares directly into me. Its rage fills my eyes and fears intoxicate my thoughts. I black out.
Helpless in my confusion, pain is rising and with every awakening I am further from the truth. I need to face the lies. Bravely I open my eyes.